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Break Through Self-Doubt and Fear

8/3/2014

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Self-doubt and fear interfere with our ability to achieve or set goals. Self-doubt and fear are the voices in our head telling us, "You'll never succeed, so why try?" and "who do you think you are?" Self-doubt and fear are also what make us listen to those voices and decide to give up before we get started. 
 

While many people experience self-doubt and fear at some point in their lives, they take action anyway. Others remain stuck, or are confident in only one area of their life, such as work. They are too afraid to try new things like going back to school, entering new relationships or learning new skills. 
 
When we let self-doubt and fear rule our lives, we miss opportunities. We predict and believe that nothing good will happen to us, so we don't try anything new, and refuse to take even low-level risks. This leads us to discount people or situations that could help us reach our goals. While self doubt and fear can come in different forms and from different sources, we can learn to break through them. 
 
The vicious cycle of self-doubt and fear can paralyze you to no end. You have to learn to rule self doubt and not let it rule you. Understand that you are the decision maker and you can change the way you think is you just have a little faith.  you can be successful in whatever you do. 

To live with self-doubt is to like having your life ruled by the feelings. Don't focus on the negative concentrate on the positive. I know this can be difficult but it is not impossible. We are equipped with this ability but we must learn to use this part of us to fight fear and self doubt. Stop telling yourself that you are not good enough or that you will not make it. Realize that it is that you may just be afraid to try. Know, that we do not inherit a spirit of fear but one of love. 

Making positive changes
learn to change your attitude about yourself. read about and talk to people who have broken through their self-doubts and taken control of their lives.  get support from others and consciously began turning Your destructive self-talk into constructive self-talk. if you took certain actions, your mind and emotions will follow. began to plan and achieve your goals. Have faith in your ability.  then you will soon see that life will began to improve. learn to let go of blame and start to take small risks. stop comparing yourself to other people and began to open up to new  opportunities. 
 
If you need help overcoming feelings of self-doubt and fear, please read these ten techniques and processes that have helped me get to this place in my life.
 
1. Make a list of your fears. Only by admitting that they exist can you seek solutions. 
2. Write down how these fears affect your life. 
3. Become aware of the voices in your head and write down those negative messages. 
4. Start building a support system of friends and eliminate people from your life who foster feelings of negativity. 
5. Join a support group of people who have similar issues. 
6. Change each negative message to one that is affirming and constructive. 
7. Read books that help you feel better about yourself. 
8. Be aware of your past, and be willing to let go of it. 
9. List your goals and the actions you need to achieve them. 
10. Take one of those actions every day. Each time you do something that brings you closer to achieving your goals you will feel better about yourself. 
 
When fears and self-doubts come back, and they still do, I break through them by using the tools and skills I've learned and now teach. They work.

Be Blessed Family!



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Hold On To Your Dreams

5/30/2014

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How many times have you abandoned an idea, project or dream because someone made a disparaging remark or rolled their eyes when you told them about it?

Relinquishing your dreams

All too frequently we allow others to dictate what is good, right or possible. We allow them to steal our dreams. Notice I use the word "allow." No one can put you down, stomp on your dream, or kill an idea of yours unless you allow them to.

Consider this:

The movie Star Wars was rejected by every movie studio in Hollywood before 20th Century Fox finally produced it. It went on to be one of the largest-grossing movies in film history.

As a child, Sylvester Stallone was frequently beaten by his father and told he had no brains. He grew up an unhappy loner. He floated in and out of schools. An adviser at Drexel University told him that based on his aptitude tests he should pursue a career as an elevator repair person. It's not a bad profession but it's certainly not where "Rocky" ended up!

Einstein was criticized for not wearing socks or cutting his hair. He didn't speak until he was four, and didn't read until he was seven. One observer noted, "He could be mentally retarded."

An expert said of Vince Lombardi:"He possesses minimal football knowledge and Lacks motivation.  

Beethoven handled the violin awkwardly and preferred playing his own compositions instead of improving his technique. His teacher proclaimed him hopeless as a composer.

Walt Disney was fired from his job as a newspaper editor for lack of ideas. He also went bankrupt several times before he created Disneyland.

Henry Ford failed and went broke 5 times before he finally
succeeded.

Louisa May Alcott, the author of Little Women, was encouraged to find work as a servant or seamstress. She would certainly never be a writer.

In 1944, the director of the Blue Book Modeling Agency told modeling hopeful Norma Jean Baker (Marilyn Monroe), "You'd better learn secretarial work, or else get married."

It Takes Courage

So what are your ideas? Your thoughts? Your dreams? Your
plans?

It doesn't matter if anyone supports what you want to do. The important thing is for YOU to believe. For YOU to ignore the people who say you can't do it - and DO IT ANYWAY! It takes courage. It takes persistence. It takes believing in the "voice inside" when no one else does. Ideas, dreams and visions are planted within you because you have the ability to make them happen. You’ll learn, grow, scramble, fail, and get back up again! The important thing is to simply never give up. The people I mentioned earlier never gave up - and they made great things happen!



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Harness The Power Of Words In Your Life

4/20/2014

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Thousands of words pour out of our mouths each day as our thoughts, opinions, judgments and beliefs are freely expressed. Often, however, we are oblivious to the positive or negative effect these words have on ourselves and the people around us.



Speaking comes to most people as naturally as breathing. On many occasions our words are uttered without conscious thought; in fact we rarely stop and think about what we are saying. Thousands of words pour out of our mouths each day as our thoughts, opinions, judgments and beliefs are freely expressed. Often, however, we are oblivious to the positive or negative effect these words have on ourselves and the people around us.

Words have tremendous power. Words give out energy and a message which creates a reaction in others. Everything you say produces an effect in the world. Whatever you say to someone else will produce some kind of an effect in that person. We are constantly creating something, either positive or negative with our words. Reaction to our words often returns to us often in a multiplied form. For example if I speak words of judgement to a person they will judge me back, probably with more intensity as their judgement has the pain or anger caused by my words attached to it Words of kindness and acceptance will generate a warm and appreciative reaction in a person. That person’s response to the words will be stronger because it will have the emotion created by the words attached to it. The power of words has a ripple effect in our life and those around us.


Recently I came across the work of Dr Emoto, and his studies on water crystals. He took samples of water, froze them and took photographs of the water crystals. He then wrote words on vials of water taken from the same source. The crystals formed in the vials which had positive words, such as love and gratitude, were beautiful. However the crystals in the vials with negative words such as hate and evil were very different, and the water didn't even form crystals in some instances. Experiments were done using words from different languages, and also by the scientists having no knowledge of what the words meant.  The findings of this study on water crystals has had a profound impact on me. The human body is known to be composed of up to ninety percent water. If words had such a significant impact on water crystals, then what is the impact of positive and negative words to our bodies?

An important key to success in life is to understand the power of words. A word is a thought externalized. Our thoughts do have a great effect on us even though they are internal. What we think effects the way we live our life, it effects our emotions, our attitudes and our behavior. A thought spoken, however, has even more power. It can never be taken back; it is out of our mouth and will have an effect. Our words have even more power than our thoughts because they not only affect ourselves, but the people and the world around us. 

Successful people take control of their words, rather than letting their words control them. They are more conscious of their thoughts and words and the power they unleash. Successful people understand that they need to speak positively rather than negatively in order to see success. Successful people are characterized by the words that they speak. They know the importance of speaking words that will build self-esteem and confidence, build relationships and build possibilities. They speak words of affirmation, encouragement, love, acceptance and appreciation.

To see more personal success, the words that we speak need to be in alignment with what we want to see being produced in our life – our vision and our dreams. Your words can determine your destiny. Even more importantly, your words can make a positive difference on the people you interact with every day. Before you speak ask yourself: Is what I am about to say going to uplift the hearer? Will it inspire, motivate, and create forward momentum for them? Will it dissolve fear and create safety and trust? Will I create a positive or negative ripple effect by speaking out these words? Let‘s be determined to unleash the power of words for positive change.



Be Blessed Family!



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Fire Up Your Motivation

3/29/2014

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Motivation seems to come and go, here today and gone tomorrow depending on what is going on in our life each day. The need to stay motivated is paramount to success, so let's get your motivation Fired UP!

You should be able to find several indispensable facts about motivation in the following paragraphs. If there's at least one fact you didn't know before, imagine the difference it might make. 

It's so difficult to go on when everything seems to fail, isn't it? Are there times in your life when you really want to call it "quits" because you just can't see any good results from all the hard work you've done?

Hold your horses!

Never ever think of giving up. Winners never quit and quitters never win. Take all negative words out of your mental dictionary and focus on the solutions with utmost conviction and patience. The battle is never lost until you've abandon your vision.

But what if you're really exhausted physically, mentally, and most of all emotionally? Here are some sources of motivation to prompt you in reaching the peak of accomplishment.


1) The Overwhelming Feeling of Attaining your Desired End

How would you feel after accomplishing your mission? Of course you will feel ecstatic. You might be shedding tears of joy. Let this tremendous feeling sink in and encourage you to persist despite all odds.

2) The Reward System

How would you feel if you've entered a contest, but there are no prizes for the winners? It's not very encouraging, isn't it?

The same principles apply to your vision. Reward yourself after accomplishing a goal. Set a particular incentive for every objective.

Let's say if you've achieved a particular task, you'll treat yourself to your favorite restaurant. When you've finished a bigger task, you'll go on a vacation. 

Got the idea?

Just set something gratifying to indulge in after completing a certain undertaking. 

The best time to learn about motivation is before you're in the thick of things. Wise readers will keep reading to earn some valuable motivation experience while it's still free. 

3) The Powerful Force of Humanity

If you want to succeed, surround yourself with the right kind of people who will support and encourage you all the way.

Be with people who have the same beliefs and aspirations as yours. Positive aura is generated by this fusion of collective energy from people of "like minds."

On the contrary, being with people who oppose your ways of thinking may trigger a negative, yet very powerful, kind of motivation.

Has anyone ever said to you that "You'll never get anywhere" or "You're wasting your time with what you're doing?"

Didn't it make you furious and determined enough to prove to them how wrong they were? This is what I'm talking about.

When aggravated, you will do anything to make those who are against you swallow their words. But of course, your main focus should be on the accomplishment of your goal and not for the purpose of revenge. Never let your emotions toward others alter your main objective.

4) Take Care Of Your Health

Exercise regularly. Fill your brains with enough oxygen to allow you to do your daily tasks with more vigor and energy.

Take regular breaks if time allows. Having the will power to continue despite all hardships is extremely important, but you should still know your limits.

If you don't take enough rest, you will not be able to think clearly and you will not be able to do your tasks properly. In the process, you will just get more frustrated. 

Take sufficient sleep and recharge yourself after a hard day's work. Never, ever ignore your health. I've learned my lesson when I sacrificed my health for the sake of success. I've worked very long hours everyday and just got minimal sleep. As a result, I became ill.

It's not worth it. Success won't matter if you don't have good health to enjoy it.

Fire up your motivation and live life to the fullest!

That's how things stand right now. Keep in mind that any subject can change over time, so be sure you keep up with the latest news.


Be Blessed Family!



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Burn The Ships

3/9/2014

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It is tempting to retreat to safety and comfort when challenges and difficulties arise. To avoid turning around and abandoning your goals, you must make going forward more compelling then going back.



One of the keys to reaching your goals is to eliminate any escape routes. It is tempting to retreat to safety and comfort when challenges and difficulties arise. To avoid turning around and abandoning your goals, you must make going forward more compelling then going back.


When striving towards a goal, you must focus on what you want to obtain and avoid the impulse to go back to what you know and to what is comfortable. When Spanish Conquistador Hernando Cortez landed in Mexico, one of his first orders to his men was to burn the ships. Cortez was committed to his mission and did not want to allow himself or his men the option of going back to Spain. By removing this option, Cortez and his men were forced to focus on how they could make the mission successful.


Eliminating an escape route creates a compelling reason to focus on the goal and to keep moving forward. However, it is important to keep in mind that although Cortez had his men burn the ships, he did not have them burn the food and supplies. Cutting off an escape route to increase motivation and create the desire to press on where you might otherwise give up is totally different from throwing caution to the wind and taking undue risks. Reaching your goals still requires prudent planning and managing. All goals contain a certain degree of risk, but it isn't necessary to create undue risk and stress by not properly planning and thus lacking the necessary tools and supplies to achieve your goal. Take risks, but don't be careless or foolish and simply hope that everything will be okay.


Before you decide to burn your ships, make sure you have the supplies and tools necessary to achieve the goal. Something like quitting your job might sound like a good way to close the escape route, but it might also be a fast way to bankruptcy if you don't have resources to carry you through. Creating a savings account balance or having a journey job (a job that is a stepping stone to what you really want) allows you to take the risk of leaving your current job without creating undue risk. I once took a six-month leave of absence from a job while I was deciding if I wanted to move to a different state. Although it was difficult making the transition as I was very homesick, once I found a job in my new location, I resigned from the job I had waiting for me because I knew it would be too tempting to go back.


Close off the escape routes and make sure that you have a compelling reason to move forward. However, at the same time, make sure that you plan for the risk and have the tools, supplies and resources you need to achieve your goals. You can't eliminate risk but you can plan for it. Don't just jump in without thinking through the process and having a solid plan for moving forward.

Be Blessed Family!



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Allow Time For Germination

3/2/2014

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New ideas can take time to get used to. When we first hear the idea we may not be ready for it. That is fine. When you are ready the idea will sprout and grow and be there for you.

There is a concept called seed planting. It means that it takes time for new ideas and suggestions to be embraced. There are clients that take hold of a new idea and run with it, some take a little more time to allow the idea to grow while others can take years before the idea sprouts. Still some clients will never grasp the idea. It will simply lay dormant. It doesn't really matter what the client does with the idea. The purpose is to plant the seed and the client can do with it what they will. Sometimes the idea just needs time to germinate.

Sometimes It takes years for that seed to germinate in your brain until one day it just sprouts and grow into a concept you understand. New ideas can take time to get used to. When you first hear the idea you may not be ready for it. That is fine. When you are ready the idea will sprout and grow and be there for you.

The other side of this is not to force your ideas and suggestions onto other people. By all means share them, but leave it at that. Seed planting isn't an aggressive act; it is gentle and done with love and compassion. All you can do is plant the idea. What happens to it is up to the individual and what they are ready to hear at that very moment. The idea may sprout right away or it may take years. That isn't your concern. Your job is to plant the seed and move on.

Everyone is at different places in their lives. Sometimes you will understand the new idea right away and perhaps even take action on it in the moment. At other times it will take a while. Don't beat yourself up when you don't get something right away. It just means the idea is in germination. When you are ready the idea will sprout and grow and be right there to support you. Until then don't worry about it and go on with the ideas you are ready for. There will be plenty of idea seeds sprouting at any given time to keep you busy.


Be Blessed Family!



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Discover Your Path To Success Part 3

2/23/2014

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If you have read this far, we both know you are serious about succeeding, getting the most out of life, and attaining your goals.

Now, how do you “keep the fire burning” during life’s daily struggle? It’s simple really, but will require the patience to take each task into consideration, without doing everything at once.

You will get the urge to make up for lost time. You now want to jump ahead at “light speed.” If you already read Parts One and Two of this series, you are way ahead of the pack. So many people sit around and dream, doubt, or just talk, but very few take action and then stick with it.

The next step is to get a “coach.” You are now thinking, coaches are expensive; and you are right, but you don’t have to spend much. Here’s how it works: Look for the most positive person you can find, see, or hear, around you. This person is full of positive energy, and all you have to do is listen.

You can be selective about advice, but realize that positive energy is contagious, and you will walk away from conversations with positive energy, too. On the other hand, stay away from negative talk; it is also contagious.

Are you in need of more positive energy? No problem - read articles like this, read self-improvement books, or listen to inspirational audio books, to instill positive energy within you. You can’t lose with a steady dose of positive energy to carry you through the day.

So how do you separate good information from bad? Where do you start, and what, or who, would you listen to first? In the last, and final article of this series, I promise to reveal some great resources, but for now, it’s a good idea to gain positive energy by choosing sources that you find interesting.

If I lead you to a classic self-improvement book, you might find it boring.
However, if you start to read something and can’t put it down, you are getting positive energy and you are enjoying it.

Do yourself a favor, and get a self-improvement source today. You don’t have to implement all of the advice you read - just take what fits into your lifestyle.

Now, let’s look at visualization. This is an extremely powerful treasure, and all of us have the ability to visualize. Ever since the first human had a fantasy, and it came to pass, the power of visualization has built entire civilizations.

Think about what you want, close your eyes, envision it, and see that you have accomplished it. This is only an exercise, but it is an exercise toward success. Never confuse visualization with “pipe dreams.” Visualization is an exercise to cultivate positive energy, move forward, and accomplish goals.

The hidden treasures you found today are patience, the ability to learn, and visualization. Again, you already had them, but patience will require a little extra work, as it does for all of us.

Be Blessed Family!




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Discover Your Path to Success-Part 2

2/5/2014

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Time taken for self-analysis is so important in developing your road map to success. Let’s continue with a few more questions to ask yourself - before we go into the heart of the formula for personal success.

Are you easily distracted?


Most people cannot focus on a goal, without getting “side tracked.” When this cannot be helped, you can develop a new skill set, through meditation, or by learning not to give up. You can learn to meditate in a variety of ways. There are many good books and CD’s. A very good CD is Meditation Made Simple by John Daniels.

Picture it like this: Christopher Columbus truly had a one-dimensional personality; he was focused on finding an alternate route to Asia, to the point of being a poor “family man.” However, unlike most people, he stayed focused and never gave up.

Now you don’t have to give up everything in life to achieve a goal, but you have to focus on your goal, avoid giving up, getting depressed, and make up your mind to enjoy the journey. It is still wise to have a complete life by allowing time for your family and friends. If you stay on a straight course, you will be “ahead in the game,” but you will have to mentally focus on your end result, even in bad economic times.

Can you rationally separate good advice from bad?

You will hear many opinions – some will be constructive, and others will be useless. You will have to know the difference, by evaluating all advice without emotion, and with an open mind.

Is the ultimate reward worth the cost and sacrifice?

You should already know that you may invest time, money, work, or all three, to reach your ultimate goal. Envision yourself reaching your ultimate objective, and if it is worth all of the sacrifice, then you should move on to the next step.

Start moving forward now. If you didn’t write your goals down, evaluate them, and prioritize them, you should go back to part one again, to finish that assignment. Much similar to a business, you must have a written plan to move forward.

Just don’t worry about getting it perfect. None of us ever do, and your plans will change as you go. In fact, life is adapting to a constantly changing universe. Most of us cannot accurately predict the cycles of the economy. We design a plan and prepare to turn on a dime, if necessary. Everything in life is subject to change and all of us have to accept it.

Realizing this, you now proceed with caution toward your short-term goals.
Once you have designed your plan, there is no need to “wait until next year.”

Put your plan into action and take one forward step at a time. This one step is the biggest of all your steps, and your commitment to succeed is your “guiding light.”

Now, what were the “hidden treasures” you found in part two? The answer is focus, commitment, and acceptance. You already have them; all you need to do is get the most out of what you already have.



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Discover Your Path To Success-Part 1

2/1/2014

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Success can easily be compared to the “genie trapped in a bottle.” For many of us, it is a matter of finding a way to open the bottle, and then, follow a specific path. This path is filled with pitfalls, and traps, along the way, so it is wise to expand your vision by learning as you go.

To many people, success is a “fairytale” and as elusive as a Yeti. In reality, success is just around the corner, and sometimes already exists, as hidden treasure. I am not talking about sunken ships or Indiana Jones. What I am referring to are skills you already possess, friends and family who will help you, and accomplishments that you already have made.

When you put these hidden treasures, together, with your end goal in mind, you are on your way toward success. Now let’s look at a way to move forward every day, live a quality life, and help everyone around you, in the process.

Write all of your goals down, and keep them in a place that you will see. This could be on a piece of paper in your pocket, on your desk top, in a notebook, in your diary, or on your palm pilot. Wherever you put this information, it should be a place where you will see it, every day.

Separate realistic from lofty goals, but don’t throw lofty goals out. Also, separate short-term goals, from long-term goals, and design estimated time frames, for measured results. You don’t have to share this with anyone, unless they share the same goal. If you have, at least, one close friend, spouse, or family, who shares the same dream, you are in a very strong position.

However, you don’t need to be a “politician” to be successful, if you learn to focus on your goals, every day. Now we have to go over a few questions that will also help you design your road map toward success.

Will your goals hurt anyone? Will you have to step on anyone to get what you want?

If you answered yes to either one of the above questions, you should redefine your goal or goals, so you can achieve it or them without harming anyone in the process. If that is not possible, throw that goal out, and move on. Your goals should help people and be morally sound.

Do you have a real passion for your goals?

This one is also important because, if your goal is “flipping burgers” for money, it won’t be long, before that gets old. I have yet to meet the person, who has a real passion for flipping burgers. Please don’t get me wrong, some people are very good at it, but I have known many short order cooks, who wish they were doing something else besides “slaving” over a hot stove.

What you choose, must be something you love doing, and the money will follow. There are so many people, who craft an occupation, based upon money alone, and learn to regret it. If you have a purpose in life you have “self-worth.” Self-worth is a very valuable hidden treasure.



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Goal Setting 101

11/24/2013

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We all have goals. Some goals are long-term and some are short-term. Some are goals we have shelved for so long they are dusty and covered with cobwebs. Some are freshly minted. However for those of us who are not as successful in life as we would wish we often despair of achieving our goals. Some goals seem out-of-reach and unattainable. This does not have to be what actually happens. We have the power within ourselves to change our lives and the place to begin is when we are setting our goals.

There are simple rules that make it more likely for us to achieve our goals and the first is to follow the K.I.S.S. principle. In other words, keep it simple stupid. The more elaborate and complicated we make our goals then the less likely we will be to follow through with them.

The best way to simplify your goal setting is to only set one goal -- the ultimate goal. After that then everything else is just details. What is the ultimate goal? What is your final destination? When you are on your deathbed and you cast a look back over your life then what do you want to see accomplished there? When you look around you what do you want to see? That vision is your ultimate goal.

We all know that having a destination in mind makes traveling easier. Knowledge of that destination helps us plan what to pack and controls our transportation decisions. The same is true when it comes to setting goals and achieving those goals. If we know our destination then we know what to pack (and what to leave behind) and we can make better decisions about how to reach that destination. Simplifying our goals to that one ultimate goal also helps us focus on that one destination rather than constantly detouring and losing our way. It also makes it easier to measure the importance and relevance of so many other decisions that impact our daily life when we have the measuring stick. If we take Path A or Path B which will be more effective in reaching that ultimate destination?

Naming that ultimate goal for ourselves is a tremendously powerful tool for our own success because so often we spend our time and energy focusing on managing the details of our lives. We are simply reacting to whatever is thrown at us by others or simply by daily life. However in order to truly achieve success and achieve our goals then we must take the lead and that means acting. Simply by setting our ultimate goal and focusing our energy and time on that goal means that instead of reacting we are now taking action. That action means we have taken a leadership role in our own success. Simply by taking that action we are taking control of our own life and that is a very powerful step toward success.

If you want to achieve more success in your life then you must set one simple goal -- the ultimate goal for your life -- and you must get out in front of the goal to take action with your life instead of reacting all your life.

Be Blessed Family!



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